Open your braintank bro...

...because I'm gonna drop some premium 91 octane knowledge on y'all.

Actually it's just my opinions really.

Israel
I'm sick of this pseudo-intellectual discussion that's going on here, so all I'm about to say is as follows: As much as tjiube's comment redeemed Israel as the sole bad guys, pala and Matan did the best to prove the exact opposite.

Lena
Europe (and Israel) voted, deal with it. And I didn't like her much before the ESC but the Lena-overdose caused by mainstream and her ongoing appearances actually made me think she's kinda cute.

Köhler
The entire German parliament is a JOKE. Yes, capital letters. Why? It's the Muppet Show of international politics:
Chancellor = Woman
Foreign Minister = Homosexual
Interior Minister = Actually someone normal and qualified
Justice Minister = Widow
Finance Minister = Paraplegic (sorta)
Minister of Defense = Nobleman
Health Minister = Asian orphan
Family Minister = 32 year-old woman without children who just recently got married(!)
Secretary of Education = Catholic Theologian (need I say more?)

Those are the main ones. All they're missing is the Swedish Chef. I mean, I'm all for tolerance and shit like that, but really? Really?

Although outdated: Iceland
Just give them their 15 minutes of fame, they don't have anything apart from Björk, Sigur Rós and very warm water. They don't even have a proper army (don't tell pala, he'll go apeshit)

North Korea
It's time for this "country" to collapse, I'm just hoping the amount of casualties will stay at a low level. Everytime I watch a documentary about that "country" I throw up in my mouth a little bit.

Also, I have hidden a secret message in each of these texts, it's your turn to figure it out.

By popular demand: v*la
I don't give a shit and left it out for a reason, because it's not funny anymore and quite frankly, doesn't deserve that much attention. It was fun for a night and that's about it.