Happy birthday my beloved mate dunz.

Dear ladies and gentlemen, dear niggers,
it’s a pleasure to be doing this job.

I know I should be saying all the usual polite things about my good friend duNz, but we all know what you’re waiting to hear. Today we have gathered to celebrate the birthday of a very special person.

As I understand it, my job isn’t to console the guest of honour on this SIGNIFICANT day, so much as give everyone else something to laugh about. So having established my priorities, let me say this. Firstly, Happy Birthday, duNz. You look great.

Let me ask you a question:
Someone once told me that if you can still do half of the things you were doing at 20 that you could manage a few weeks ago, you're doing alright. He also said that if keep doing the other half, you'll get yourself in a lot of trouble. So which way will duNz go?

I think he'll do what he always has: pull up at the last minute. He has quite a few talents like that. I think we can learn from them. And so we get to the second point today, I thought I might share with you some of the lessons he’s taught me.

Here they are, in no particular order.

Number one: thanks to duNz I know that your life is awesome and you've made mine awesome as well. Thanks to you I know that mega respawns every 35 and red every 25 seconds. I just can't express how grateful I am.
Number two: you've showed me pics of all the ugly girls you fucked the nights before, I didn't even have to load youjizz to jerk off, thanks to you once again!
Number three: ...

I could go on like this for ages, but I guess you all know that duNz is one of the greatest of us.

duNz, as good as you are, please, always remember my words:

Quote

This is a 1 vs 1 Duel game
Defeat your opponent!
First player to reach the Frag Limit wins.
If time runs out, the player with the highest score wins.
If the time limit is hit and there is a tie a Sudden Death round begins.
Good luck.

Now the most important thing: If you're going to prac hard you might be as pro as me someday and will reach my skill at Quake Live.
May Quake Live be your life.