Joke exchange!
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27 Apr 2008, 21:57
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Journals
I need some new ones, post your favourites here.
I start:
Which of these three doesn´t belong there? A wife, a cancer or a blowjob?
EDIT: Few more:
Why does a nigger cry when he haves sex?
What doesn´t fit in the ass nor vibrate?
EDIT 2: LMAO because of all the bans we are getting eventhough admins are pissing themselves while reading :D
I start:
Which of these three doesn´t belong there? A wife, a cancer or a blowjob?
EDIT: Few more:
Why does a nigger cry when he haves sex?
What doesn´t fit in the ass nor vibrate?
EDIT 2: LMAO because of all the bans we are getting eventhough admins are pissing themselves while reading :D
whats the difference between santa claus and jews?
answersanta claus goes down through the chimney but jews come up
What's more funny than a dead baby?
AnswerA dead baby in a clown suit
</.old>
the answernothing
guy 2: why the jews
to the guys replying: OLOL U MEANT THE CLOWN
no shit
show hidden texthe saw his gas bill
answererection
sick baby jokes.
whats the difference between a fridge and a baby?
a fridge doesnt cry when daddys packing the meat in.
whats the best thing about having sex with 42 year olds?
theres 40 of them.
whats more fun that nailing 40 dead babies to a tree?
nailing 1 dead baby to 40 trees
<3 x
without spaces
edit: i like your sense of humor :-)
answerthe pizza doesn't scream when it's in the oven!
why are germans bad at baking?
show hidden textall the good ovens are being used
I'm damn serious.
i once spent 2 hours trying to make vinyl giggle, it didnt happen :o(
edit: that guy looks like bob kelso
foonr <3
Kelso is cute and the guy looks similar to him, indeed.
Any info about the next Scrubs episodes? :<
MY WASTE OF TIME All New
torrenttime on thursday :o)
all polaks in the moon is problem solved
First one threw chair at second, second threw shoe, etc.Big fight.
Suddenly the first one grabbed soap and wanted to throw it,
second said : stop it, it's not dad's business!
why "dad"? :/
germans made soap from dead jews :XD
you know FA? FA soap (From Aushwitz, aushwitz was the biggest camp for jews extermination, located in poland)
dunno, maybe only polish ppl get that joke ;)
think you mistyped it.
I wrote FA - It's the name of a soap brand, but I dunno if it's sell in other country than Poland. So FA, "From Aushwitz". That's why I wrote "dunno, maybe only polish ppl get that joke"
rofl at you, first read everything before writing bullshit ;)
Your poor english was the reason, aight? :D
Narty.
Dwoch zydow poklocilo sie w baraku w aushwitz, jeden rzucil w drugiego krzeslem, drugi w pierwszego butem, rzucaja wszystkim co popadnie. ogolnie napierdalanka.
w pewnym momencie jeden zlapal mydlo i juz chcial nim rzucic, gdy drugi krzyknal: no, tylko ojca w to nie mieszaj!
better now?
przeciez zupy z nich kurwa nie robili :/
kurwa czy nikt nie rozumie prostego kawalu? :XD
answer2 for talking shit and 4 to redress that
AnswerA dead baby in 2 trash containers
AnswerDepends on how hard you throw
:x
the answer there is no difference!
if the gummi tears up, u have a problem.
(sry for my low- english :X)
some german "jokes"Wie bringt man 3 kg Fett dazu, gut auszusehen?
Man tut einen Nippel drauf.
Was heißt "Jungfrau" auf chinesisch?
Muschizu.
Was ist der Unterschied zwischen Uncle Ben's Reis und einem weiblichen Orgasmus?
Uncle Ben's Reis gelingt immer!
Was ist die größte Gemeinsamkeit zwischen einer Frau und einer Kreissäge?
Wenn man abrutscht, ist der Finger im Arsch!
Warum schwitzen Frauen zwischen zwei Orgasmen immer so stark?
Weil ein ganzer Sommer dazwischen liegt...
Was fühlt eine Frau beim Orgasmus?
Mir doch egal!
Woran erkennt man eine heißblütige Frau?
Wenn man unten einen Maiskolben rein steckt kommt oben Popkorn raus.
Was ist der Unterschied zwischen einem Porsche und einer Jungfrau?
Es gibt keinen. In beide kommt man schlecht rein, aber wenn man erst mal drin ist, fühlt man sich sauwohl.
Warum haben Frauen vier Lippen?
Zwei zum Scheiße reden und zwei zum wiedergutmachen.
Was macht eine Frau nach dem Geschlechtsverkehr?
Sie stört.
Was sitzt im Dunkeln, hat Flügel und saugt Blut?
Die neue Always Ultra
answer: when you see toilet paper hanging on the clotheslines.
AnswerThey're easier to spot!
answerwhen you cut onion you shed tears
suddenly, french one pull out his hand from the plane and said with proud: now we are over the France, I just touched the eiffel tower !
after that english one did the same and said : now we are over the england, I just touched the Big Ben!
at last the polish one pulled his hand out and said : now we are over the Poland, somebody just stole my fucking watch
AnswerYou can't unload a truck full of bowling balls with a pitchfork!
Racist!? :O
zeh answerThe iron lung
/edit: awesome journal tbh :D
Don was so excited to be going bear hunting. He spotted a small Brown Bear in the woods and shot it.
Then there was a tap on his shoulder, he turned around to see a big Black Bear. The Black Bear said, "Don, you've got two choices, either I maul you to death or we have sex." Don decided to bend over.
Even though he felt sore for two weeks Don soon recovered and vowed revenge. He headed out on another trip where he found the Black Bear and shot it.
There was another tap on his shoulder. This time a huge Grizzly Bear was standing right next to him. The Grizzly said, "That was a huge mistake Don. You've got two choices. Either I maul you to death, or we have rough sex." Again, Don thought it was better to comply.
Although he survived, it took several months before Don finally recovered. Outraged he headed back to the woods, managed to track down the Grizzly and shot it. He felt the sweet taste of revenge.
But then there was a tap on his shoulder. Don turned round to find a giant Polar Bear standing there. The Polar Bear said, "Admit it Don, you don't really come here for the hunting, do you?"
answerPUNK IS NOT DEAD
FEMALE INTERVIEWER: "So, General Reinwald, what things are you going to teach these young boys when they visit your base?"
GENERAL REINWALD: 'We're going to teach them climbing, canoeing, archery, and shooting."
FEMALE INTERVIEWER: "Shooting! That's a bit irresponsible, isn't it?"
GENERAL REINWALD: "I don't see how. They'll be properly supervised on the rifle range."
FEMALE INTERVIEWER: "Don't you admit that this is a terribly dangerous activity to be teaching children?"
GENERAL REINWALD: "I don't see how, we will be teaching them proper rifle range discipline before they even touch a firearm."
FEMALE INTERVIEWER: " But you're equipping them to become violent killers."
GENERAL REINWALD: "Well, you're equipped to be a prostitute, but you're not one, are you?"
The radio went silent and the interview ended.
He asked god "does this mean that I'm an angel now?"
God laughed and said "nah boy, you're a bat"
And he goes, "I want all my people in Americato be happy and free in Mexico.''
So the genie-- Poof!. And all the spics are in Mexico.
And then he asks the nigger.
He goes to the nigger says, "What do you want?''
And he goes, "I want all my nigger brothers in America to be back in Africa and happy and everything.''
So the genie goes poof!.
And, all the niggers in America are in Africa.
So the genie says to the white guy, "What's your one wish?''
And the white guy goes, "You mean to tell me...
all the niggers and spics|are out of America?''
The genie goes, "Yeah.''He says,
" Well, um, I'll have a Coke then.''
1st dwarf tries and tries but cant get an erection,
to make things worse, all night alls he can hear is the 2nd dwarf shouting
"here i come again' 1 2 3 uhhh"
next morning 1st dwarf says to 2nd dwarf,
"fuck me that was embarrasing, i couldnt get an erection"
2nd dwarf says "you think thats bad?"
"i couldnt even get on the fucking bed"
answerbecause they all want to sit in the front
A jew is taking a ride on the public bus, and he's seated behind the driver... at the second stop a nun enters the bus and sits down on the other side of the pathway next to the jew.
The jew takes a good look at the nun and says: I'd definitely like to do you, you're hot!
The nun answers, I'm sorry I'm in love with god and god only... not interested.
A few stops later the nun get's out and when the busdrivers pulls up again he says: hey jew, you know what i know how you can still get with that nun. She goes to the church's graveyard every night to pray to god... So if you dress up like god, appear in the graveyard and tell her you'd like to fuck her I bet she will do it!
The jew thanks the driver and sure enough, the next evening he's there waiting in the graveyard and after a while the nun shows up.
When she's started praying to god suddenly the jew, in his costume, jumps up and says: nun, I am god and I appear for you now so we can have sex!
The nun is very surprised but of course obliges and after a few hours, when they are done, the jew suddenly rips off his costume and calls: HA! got you! I'm the jew from the bus! Then the nun suddenly rips off her clothes and calls! HA! got you, Im the bus driver!
:D
We discovered that when I am in a good mood it turns green and when I am in a bad mood it leaves a big fucking red mark on her forehead.
makes me lol everytime :-D
After a night fill of hot steaming sex they both wake up after a very big yawn, the blond says: "wow, you're very good dentist!! I didn't feel anything!"
an 8 and a 0 are together walking over street. after a while the 0 suddenly stops walking and while turning around, the 8 asks: what's wrong 0, why did you stop?
the 0 answers: "well, 8, I'm just wondering why in god's name do you wear your belt so tight"
your mother is so fat, when she walks in front of the tv you probably miss the entire Lord of the Rings trilogy
your mother is so fat, everytime she turns around it's her birthday
your mother is so fat, if she'd wear a watch on each wrist they'd both have to be in different timezones
answerkan hij lekker scheuren!
waarom heeft een turk altijd een plant op zijn auto staan?
answerom de politie om de tuin te leiden
waarom heeft een turk altijd een mes in zijn auto?
answerom de bochten af te snijden
het is geel het is krom het staat om de hoek en het is geen banaan
answerstiekem toch een banaan!
answer[img]
http://www.graffitieuropa.org/news/51/Bush-Saddam-BinLadden.jpg[/img]