How To Make A Successful Competition Map.

Firstly, your map should be shaped like triangle. Three is the magic number and you don't want to fuck with it. Circles are too frilly and arrogant with their infinite sides and continuos tangents. Anything with more than 4 sides is just unrealistic and a square is, well it's a square, the fonz would not approve.

Now that you have your shape sorted you're going to want to add some textures. Stop right there. Do you see what you did? You started thinking that you're some kind of fucking artist. Maps should always be bright pink for visibility purposes.

Next come buildings, these should all be triangles. If you have to, make pyramids, but a good map slut would be able to make triangles 3 dimensional without adding another dimension. You can have up to 3 buildings, but any more than that and not only are you contradicting the magic number theorem, but you're also going to confuse the shit out of the average gamer playing your map for the first time. Buildings should also be bright pink, I don't care if they blend in to the background, visibility is all that matters.

Finally comes the objective, but objectives are for peons so just put a tank on a triangular loop and set the map time to infinity. Congratulations, you've made a successful map.

Actually, the above was all bullshit. The best way to make a competition map is to copy venice but add the supply depot texture to every surface, commonly reffered to as the special delivery effect, and then proceed to add as many arbitrary map events as possible until the map lasts just the right amount of time in competition.

Next Week: Advanced techniques for avoiding and ignoring constructive feedback.