English assignment

by seconddd • 27 Oct 2008, 20:17 • Journals
hello guys. I have to make a fairy tale for english, but since I'm lazy I stole one from the webs and edited it a little.

now 've got a few problems:

- past simple of: "seem"
- how many words this story is below
- and if this is ok:


Once upon a while there was a very old man with 4 sons.
These 4 sons were very lazy, anoying and stupid.
But after years the old man was getting sick and went to the local alchemist for a medicine,
he needed 4 ingredients for the medicine which the 4 sons had to get.
When the 4 sons heared that they had to get ingredients for a medicine they all thought: "can't he just die?" but one brother said that the had to do it, for their father.

The sons came on an idea to let every brother search 1 of the 4 ingredients and it see ...

thanks in advance!
Comments
17
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Panda 27 Oct 2008, 20:19
pm nwi`TheoDor, he should be able to sort you out!
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FeedMe 27 Oct 2008, 20:19
annoying*
+ bit overuse of the 4 sons imo :<

for how many words it is , there is an option in Word (extra -> count words or smt)
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seconddd 27 Oct 2008, 20:21
Haven't got word yet, since my PC has just been formated.
Maybe you could check :>
Parent
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xeoxis 27 Oct 2008, 20:22
first paragraph = 88 words.
Parent
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xeoxis 27 Oct 2008, 20:20
"And it seems to be"
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pala 27 Oct 2008, 20:21
try to use more smart words, like stupid = fool or something
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senn 27 Oct 2008, 20:22
if you pass for that, your school fails
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seconddd 27 Oct 2008, 20:23
Haha :xD. highest possible here
Parent
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Domi 27 Oct 2008, 20:30
and it seemed?
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Nugis 27 Oct 2008, 20:32
Once upon a time, there was an old man with four sons. The sons were very lazy, annoying and foolish. But after many years, the old man was getting sicker and decided to attend the local apothecary for a medicine. He was in need of four ingredients for the medicine, which the sons were ought to get. When the sons heard that they were supposed to get ingredients for a medicine, they all thought whether to let the man die in peace. However, one brother said that they should do it to aid their dying father.

The siblings came up with an idea to let each brother search for one of the four ingredients and it seemed ...

edited some of the words, added commas and linking words, got rid of the words that were repeatedly occuring in your text and also note that numbers 1-10 are always written in words in case of a formal writing (well, somewhat formal..)
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seconddd 27 Oct 2008, 20:43
Very nice done!
How should I do it if I want to mention the 4 ingredients?
Since I need about 200-300 words I need some more information
Parent
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Paintrain 27 Oct 2008, 20:59
top secret ingredients: potassium, saltpeter, thisle, rosemary
Parent
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Paintrain 27 Oct 2008, 20:41
Once upon a time there was a very old man with four sons.
These sons were very lazy, annoying and not too bright either.
But after years the old man was getting sick and went to the local alchemist for a medicine.
It turned out that he needed four different ingredients for the medicine which his sons needed to get.
When the sons heard that they had to get ingredients for a medicine, they all thought: "can't he just die?" But one brother felt responsible and asked the others to help him. It was their father after all.
The sons came up with the idea of letting every single brother take care of one of the four ingredients and it seemed like a good plan.
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PhAz 27 Oct 2008, 20:54
You are seventeen years old and you have to this kind of stuff? :D
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Nugis 27 Oct 2008, 21:01
actually, no

http://www.thefreedictionary.com/dying

take a look here :)
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michL 27 Oct 2008, 21:09
you should check out the netcoders-forum! Those guys know all about fairy tales...
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