ET l1f3
This journal is showing behaviour of some of ET players. You can find it interesting, funny, sad- depends on you. It contains 4 parts: about asslicking to admin, about teamwounding @ pubz, skillometer and about posts @ xfire.
I have to admit admin that first 2 parts were translated from someone's text about CS, hovewer it's so similar for ET that it was worth translating I think.
And yes, I WAS BORED!
Admin
After you have connected to a server, check, if there isn’t any admin there (admin’s nick list you should know before you enter a game). If there is one, nicely say „hello” to him and give some comments at his work ( of course positive only). Mostly you have to know who is the owner of the server, rest of admins are not so important. Then you have to hope that glad admin will satisfy your wants and wishes of changing maps ( without not necessary voting part), kicking/ banning a player who you think is using aimbots, wallhacks and any other cheats you just met or , who knows, maybe he will invite you to an admin list..:?
There are many ways of asslicking but you have to remember the golden rule: Admin is always right . So, for example, if admin changed map when game was really interesting and enjoyable, you have to be happy because of it, admire him and say that on other map game will surely be better. Other example, if an admin kicked a player to use a weapon which number is limited ( eg. panzerfaust) you have to say that now your (or other) team will be much more stronger now. The same you have to say when kicked player is back and started t whine. Then you can add that ‘good admin gave you a great occasion to train other weapon’ as well. If you have been kicked, accidentally you hope, for some reasons, just get back to server and do not talk about it. If you don’t speak about something= that something never happened :).
Teamkilling and camping
There are wise admins, good admins, admins who treats us good and there are random players who don’t need to be treated in any special way. So, if during fight you have been teamkilled and it was an admin, then 100% it was an accident. But if it was a random player, then he MUST have done it on purpose. Who the fuck allowed him to kill us ffs?! All, knowing good customs, players knows what to do in that case -> a revenge. So, we take a good position and in proper time we ‘accidentally’ kill our Enemy. He kills us with knife? We take covert and use satchel. He uses grenade? Panzerfaust is our friend then. Hovewer teamkills are nice, you have to pay attention on number of complaints. If you collect too much number of it, you get kicked. Much better way of revenge is teamwounding- provocated Enemy will teamkill you. Hovewer you will loose few minutes of a game, your Enemy should collect enough teamkills to get kicked, isn’t it awesome and wise revenge?
So now you know how to punish your teammates. Let’s move on frag category. Let me ask you: which player got the biggest chances on killing player from opposite team with taking as less risc as possible:
A. Allied engineer rushing alone to tank via main entrance on sw_goldrush_te
B. Axis medic waiting on 6 allied in spawn area
C. Axis field ops calling artillery while camping under tree on fueldump
Answering this question isn’t so hard, especially because in correct answer, C, key word ‘camp’ was used. So, obviously there are many players who are camping just to take easy frags.
It’s not a nice feeling when after 5 minutes of great performance you get killed by camper’s panzerfaust. What to do to get rid of useless moron? Change teams and start ‘teambleeding’ procedure:-)
skillometer
Now, when you know all tutorial stuff, it’s time to get skills! You want to know what skill you have?- have a look on that skillometer:
0-39 xp per 15 mins map -> you are low, sorry ;(
40-79 xp -> low+
80-119 xp-> med.
120-159 xp -> med.+
160-199 xp -> high
200-239 xp -> high +
240 and more -> you should be banned cause of cheats
It doesn’t really matter at what server you have collected your experience points or what weapon have you used: just look at your xp- it will tell you all. Also, you can pay attention on your accuracy sometimes: if you have low acc on whole map, just leave and join team 1 minute before map ending, take pf and kill someone- your nick will be displayed on award list on ‘highest acc’ position. Then write in pub chat: ‘wtf only 100% acc, at 150 fps i should have more ;<’ You will show then you have good pc and you are fine aimer.
How to search for a clan?
The most popular way of looking for a clan is posting on crossfire. Let me help you with building proper post. First of all- you have to make sure that under your post many players from community will write anything. More posts -> more community attention -> more chances of finding a clan.
Let’s start from nick. It’s a good pickup to choose a nick which is very similar to well-known player. For example, picking nicks: Sheepie, Sikora or perfoheiser. How does it exactly work? First of all, you got a chances that someone will think it’s really teh highskillz0r and will recruit you. Secondly, you will have numerous posts ‘nickstealer’. Just write then that you have chosen that nick 2 years ago and there is no problem. But thanks to that, you will have many posts. The most excellent thing is to fake a player who is not playing anymore. You can always say ‘i’m back’. Main disadvantage of such decision is if you get busted ( which is very probable- ‘quit-players’ got some friends), you will have to change your guids then.
It’s also nice to write that you speak/write fluent english and make 2 grammar mistakes. There will always be loads of users who will quote your mistakes. More posts -> more attention = you have what you wanted.
Other part is skill. The best option is to put ‘med.+’ in your info. Tons of users flaming at you will appear just after you posted -> you got attention. Furthermore, you can’t write that you are low+/med. just because most of the readers are substracting the skill as they know there are many skillfakers. ‘med.+’ is magic for crossfire, so why not try to use it a bit:?
Well-build profile can be a nice add. Make sure you have added some skilled players in your buddylist. It’s good to select those players who do not add anybody to their buddylist-> you will be able to defend yourself from accusations of ‘buddylist noob’. Add some achievements- can be funny, eg.
knifed yourself on ettv. Also writing that you have won some random cups can be helpful. Who cares you didn’t really play. Write some good ex-clans who aren’t existing anymore- no one will be able to check if it’s true then. Crabcounter is a must as well.
Use ‘community language’= abbrevations like ‘nP’, ‘lawl’, etc. Post your comments on other topics, use the most popular: ‘low+max!’, ‘gl’, ‘who cares’.
Show you got a sense of humour! Google internet and find some funny picture, then place it above your post. Don’t forget about adding: ‘Flame on’ at the end of your topic.
I have to admit admin that first 2 parts were translated from someone's text about CS, hovewer it's so similar for ET that it was worth translating I think.
And yes, I WAS BORED!
Admin
After you have connected to a server, check, if there isn’t any admin there (admin’s nick list you should know before you enter a game). If there is one, nicely say „hello” to him and give some comments at his work ( of course positive only). Mostly you have to know who is the owner of the server, rest of admins are not so important. Then you have to hope that glad admin will satisfy your wants and wishes of changing maps ( without not necessary voting part), kicking/ banning a player who you think is using aimbots, wallhacks and any other cheats you just met or , who knows, maybe he will invite you to an admin list..:?
There are many ways of asslicking but you have to remember the golden rule: Admin is always right . So, for example, if admin changed map when game was really interesting and enjoyable, you have to be happy because of it, admire him and say that on other map game will surely be better. Other example, if an admin kicked a player to use a weapon which number is limited ( eg. panzerfaust) you have to say that now your (or other) team will be much more stronger now. The same you have to say when kicked player is back and started t whine. Then you can add that ‘good admin gave you a great occasion to train other weapon’ as well. If you have been kicked, accidentally you hope, for some reasons, just get back to server and do not talk about it. If you don’t speak about something= that something never happened :).
Teamkilling and camping
There are wise admins, good admins, admins who treats us good and there are random players who don’t need to be treated in any special way. So, if during fight you have been teamkilled and it was an admin, then 100% it was an accident. But if it was a random player, then he MUST have done it on purpose. Who the fuck allowed him to kill us ffs?! All, knowing good customs, players knows what to do in that case -> a revenge. So, we take a good position and in proper time we ‘accidentally’ kill our Enemy. He kills us with knife? We take covert and use satchel. He uses grenade? Panzerfaust is our friend then. Hovewer teamkills are nice, you have to pay attention on number of complaints. If you collect too much number of it, you get kicked. Much better way of revenge is teamwounding- provocated Enemy will teamkill you. Hovewer you will loose few minutes of a game, your Enemy should collect enough teamkills to get kicked, isn’t it awesome and wise revenge?
So now you know how to punish your teammates. Let’s move on frag category. Let me ask you: which player got the biggest chances on killing player from opposite team with taking as less risc as possible:
A. Allied engineer rushing alone to tank via main entrance on sw_goldrush_te
B. Axis medic waiting on 6 allied in spawn area
C. Axis field ops calling artillery while camping under tree on fueldump
Answering this question isn’t so hard, especially because in correct answer, C, key word ‘camp’ was used. So, obviously there are many players who are camping just to take easy frags.
It’s not a nice feeling when after 5 minutes of great performance you get killed by camper’s panzerfaust. What to do to get rid of useless moron? Change teams and start ‘teambleeding’ procedure:-)
skillometer
Now, when you know all tutorial stuff, it’s time to get skills! You want to know what skill you have?- have a look on that skillometer:
0-39 xp per 15 mins map -> you are low, sorry ;(
40-79 xp -> low+
80-119 xp-> med.
120-159 xp -> med.+
160-199 xp -> high
200-239 xp -> high +
240 and more -> you should be banned cause of cheats
It doesn’t really matter at what server you have collected your experience points or what weapon have you used: just look at your xp- it will tell you all. Also, you can pay attention on your accuracy sometimes: if you have low acc on whole map, just leave and join team 1 minute before map ending, take pf and kill someone- your nick will be displayed on award list on ‘highest acc’ position. Then write in pub chat: ‘wtf only 100% acc, at 150 fps i should have more ;<’ You will show then you have good pc and you are fine aimer.
How to search for a clan?
The most popular way of looking for a clan is posting on crossfire. Let me help you with building proper post. First of all- you have to make sure that under your post many players from community will write anything. More posts -> more community attention -> more chances of finding a clan.
Let’s start from nick. It’s a good pickup to choose a nick which is very similar to well-known player. For example, picking nicks: Sheepie, Sikora or perfoheiser. How does it exactly work? First of all, you got a chances that someone will think it’s really teh highskillz0r and will recruit you. Secondly, you will have numerous posts ‘nickstealer’. Just write then that you have chosen that nick 2 years ago and there is no problem. But thanks to that, you will have many posts. The most excellent thing is to fake a player who is not playing anymore. You can always say ‘i’m back’. Main disadvantage of such decision is if you get busted ( which is very probable- ‘quit-players’ got some friends), you will have to change your guids then.
It’s also nice to write that you speak/write fluent english and make 2 grammar mistakes. There will always be loads of users who will quote your mistakes. More posts -> more attention = you have what you wanted.
Other part is skill. The best option is to put ‘med.+’ in your info. Tons of users flaming at you will appear just after you posted -> you got attention. Furthermore, you can’t write that you are low+/med. just because most of the readers are substracting the skill as they know there are many skillfakers. ‘med.+’ is magic for crossfire, so why not try to use it a bit:?
Well-build profile can be a nice add. Make sure you have added some skilled players in your buddylist. It’s good to select those players who do not add anybody to their buddylist-> you will be able to defend yourself from accusations of ‘buddylist noob’. Add some achievements- can be funny, eg.
knifed yourself on ettv. Also writing that you have won some random cups can be helpful. Who cares you didn’t really play. Write some good ex-clans who aren’t existing anymore- no one will be able to check if it’s true then. Crabcounter is a must as well.Use ‘community language’= abbrevations like ‘nP’, ‘lawl’, etc. Post your comments on other topics, use the most popular: ‘low+max!’, ‘gl’, ‘who cares’.
Show you got a sense of humour! Google internet and find some funny picture, then place it above your post. Don’t forget about adding: ‘Flame on’ at the end of your topic.
I'm bored too :(
nice read, good job
who cares about a pubadmin and should know them :DDDD (first i thought he means CUP-Admins)
but i like the recruitment part :]
show him competive playing and we got a new pr0playz0r in few month maybe the new mystic
friendliness > all tbh :o
bullshit tbh
Very funny stuff you wrote <3
good read
H0mer for president!
dobri den
Dzien dobry without Polish signs :<
<3, n1 article journal :P
:::DD:DD::::DDD:d:d:d::::dd
:XD
1st
2much2read
2nd
2weeks
agree
aids
ask perfo
ban
bibuy
bored
busted
butchji
care
danonic ip
discuss
EC skill
edit
e-drama
expected
format
funny NOT
gay
gj
gl
haha
hax
hb
hi2u
hi2u2
i lol'ed
lanonly
lmao
lol
low+mAx
make my day
mAus
med+
member for :
me too
mystic
n1
n1 iview
nice english
nice read
noob
no shit
nP
old
onlineonly
oops
orly?
overrated
owned
paintskill
perfoheiser
pics pls
ps
retard
rip
sarcasm
sexy
SPARTAAA
sure
true
unexpected
unhaxpected
yarly
:::DD:DD::::DDD:d:d:d::::dd
:XD
1st
2much2read
2nd
2weeks
agree
aids
ask perfo
ban
bibuy
bored
busted
butchji
care
danonic ip
discuss
EC skill
edit
e-drama
expected
format
funny NOT
gay
gj
gl
haha
hax
hb
hi2u
hi2u2
i lol'ed
lanonly
lmao
lol
low+mAx
make my day
mAus
med+
member for :
me too
mystic
n1
n1 iview
nice english
nice read
noob
no shit
nP
old
onlineonly
oops
orly?
overrated
owned
paintskill
perfoheiser
pics pls
ps
retard
rip
sarcasm
sexy
SPARTAAA
sure
true
unexpected
unhaxpected
yarly
sometimes i get 300+ XP on one stopwatch round :C
xD
LAWL, nP and stuff,
admin should sticky this :D::D:DD,d:D;:D;:D
i feel special