I know everything, ask me anything. | Journals | Crossfire

u mad?

No. Despite being the longest period of time we'll ever experience, life is too short to feel anger. Even being immortal keeps from wasting time on such pointless emotions.

Parent

who was phone ?

It was either a mental manifestation of the young boy's bad conscience, or, in fact a perverted impostor.

Parent

weird, i feel the same

u guys should hang around a little ;)

Parent

We did, we were called Pangaea back then.

Parent

What color is Henry IV's white horse ?

Pale cream, despite popular belief.

Parent

where is waldo

what does a cloud smell like?

What does condensed water smell like? Task for you, go into your kitchen, boil some water in a pot.

Parent

Sorry to tell you that a cloud is not made only of condensed water, but also made of dust and other substances. Smelling boiled water would be different!

You don't know everything :(

Parent

Okay if you want to be nitpicky like that I'll have to say that all other ingredients in a cloud either have no smell or come in so little percentages that no smell can be perceived. Also, the sense of smell is highly subjective to each person, so your question will never be fully accurately answered.

Parent

Where in the world is Carmen Sandiego?

The point of being on the run is constantly changing your location. I can not give you an answer that would be at all times true, although I can say for sure that she is NOT in San Diego, because that would be mighty stupid and unoriginal on her part.

Parent

How long is my dick?

You already told us.

Parent

that wasnt my question :) i asked him for my exact size

Parent

Admit it, you were looking at your thumb before you read this

Parent

gtfo :) thats not proven scientifically

you are a fake

Parent

No it is not. To answer as truthfully as I promised: Since there are no other indicators about penis size other than your penis itself I can't answer any more detailled other than, since, from what I know you're from Arab descent and since the Arab race has a slightly has a penis average slightly higher than Caucasian/Europeans I would personnaly guess 17-20cm.

Parent

Wrong. 11 cm :) told you once, will tell you again: faker

Parent

Again, I wouldn't know and could never tell from outside your pants. For further ridicule or admiration I'd like to know though: flaccid or erect?

Parent

flaccid or erect?

Parent

We want to know the size of your boobies then!

Parent

i didn't ask him about my boobs size imo^^

Parent

I don't understand the relevance of your argument.

Parent

neither do i with your first comment xD
but maybe you should ask mr. i-know-everything - bet he cant tell you chrchr^^

Parent

I just asked for a private information for him telling a private information :o

Parent

Ah c'mon!

Parent

:o ?

Parent

Always good to know for secret presents ;)

Parent

http://www.gamestv.org/event/27462-euphon-vs-late-night-mix/ who will win?

Late Night Mix.

Parent

Euhpon won.

Parent

"What are the 39 steps?" :)

A spy agency.

Parent

The fuck is this

everyone whats know a cfg not only the screenshot can everyone what that have send me pm with the cfg?

guys how u shot gut i mean: serials

---- -- -- -- - xD

is any script for this?

Parent

Why do I suck at ET?

This can have many reasons. You either lack motoric skills, motivation to keep practicing or proper equipment. If it's #1 I suggest to pick up another hobby if you're keen on being good at something, like horse back riding or raising doves.

Parent

What is this "practicing"?

Parent

It's the adaptation of helpful responses to recurring events within the game itself.

Parent

do i like you?

:DD

Parent

No, (and for the sake of keeping my reply truthful) you fat bitch.

Parent

haha nice one =D
but i've another one: am i in love?

Parent

You should at least be in love with yourself, everything else would be sad, so technically I'll obviously be saying yes. But for God's sake, I told you people before that I'm a shaman that lived for billions of years, not a psychic, DUH.

Parent

where did you live if you're already alive for billions of years?

Parent

I used to be a sun, but that wasn't cool at all, couldn't talk and shit.

Parent

is she in love?

Parent

Yes.

Parent

::like

Parent

What are the winning numbers of euromillions for this friday?

I can only recall facts from previous events or ultimate truths, but knowing that I'll be hero if they turn out to be true:

4,6,17,28,36;11;31

Parent

ouh you mean one - trying to get an advantage :P

Parent

:P

Parent

Fucking gravity - what makes it work?

Parent

The ironic nature of your question makes me want to respond seriously all the less.

Parent

I wonder if that's truly the problem, and not the difficulty of my question...

Parent

Even your scientists have figured that out, no need to ask a 13 billion year old shaman that question. I will not lower myself to that level.

Parent

I didn't expect a groundbreaking scientific finding from you, but an intuitively understandable explanation of a phenomena that has indeed been "figured out" by someone else.
You have failed and I conclude you to be worthless in this shaman job of yours.

Parent

Phenomenon*. Not entirely useless, am I?

Parent

Where the hell is Karoliina?

Elaborate?

Parent

If a bear was to eat your face, would your mother think you're a disgrace?

That would imply that a) I have a mother and b) Said mother doesn't think I'm a disgrace at this very moment.

Parent

Would the event of the bear eating your face also influence the fact that your mother thinks you're a disgrace? Wait, you said you don't have one.

What color are my shorts and t-shirt? They're both the same color, and I'm asking about the ones I'm wearing right now.

Parent

Nah, she thinks I'm fuck ugly.

Black.

Parent

I FUCKING KNEW THAT YOU WERE GOING TO SAY BLACK

AHAHHAHAHA

but no, they're white.

Parent

Are you lying nocti? You know I can tell.

Parent

Nope.

Serious question now, on my bike's suspension there's a + and - thing, if I adjust it towards the + side, will it make the suspension harder, or softer?

Parent

+ makes it stiffer, - softer. I'm glad I could help.

Parent

Who killed Alyona Ivanovna?

Parent

Raskolnikov.

Parent

Why did it take you 3 minutes to answer that, did you use google?

Parent

No, I had to read Crime And Punishment.

Parent

Since you wrote that you had to read it, does that mean that you didn't enjoy it?

Parent

I had to read it in order to answer your question correctly.

Parent

That's just stupid.

What is the air-speed velocity of an unladen swallow?

Parent

nooooooob xDDD =DDD

Parent

He told me to ask questions, I asked questions.

Parent

What is the sense of life?

I'll take it you ask for the meaning of life and my answer is, of course, 42.

Parent

What is 42?

Parent

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aboZctrHfK8

Parent

A link is no direct answer, FAIL! :<

I'm gonna kill myself now.

Could you recommend a special tool to do so?

Parent

Depends on what your primary preference is. A cool death, a painless death or a sympathetic death?

Parent

All combined.

Parent

Build yourself a weather balloon, say you want to be the first man in space without a suit and amateur equipment. Bring enough sleeping pills to kill yourself on the way. At a decent height, while you enjoyed a fantastic view over the beautiful landscape, you swallow all the pills while you slowly fall into a deep state of neverending sleep. While the falling asleep is actually painless the lack of air and freezing temperature will make sure you'll die for certain.

Cool factor: See shit from very far up.
Painless factor: You'll be in deep sleep so you won't feel shit.
Sympathetic factor: You die in the name of science, that's sympathetic as shit.

Parent

Thanks!

Record that action on TV and spread the word!

Parent

What is The ultimate question then?

Parent

lies!

Parent

why the hell are you doing that?

Because I'm bored and I didn't think enough people would respond to make me waste an hour on this.

Parent

tell me the first derivation of y= e^x

Parent

No.

Parent

noob

Parent

:D

Parent

1. Is it possible for someone to become addicted to therapy? And If so, how would you treat them?

2. Why do we kill people for killing people to show that killing is wrong?

3. If you try to fail, and then succeed, what've you really done?

4. What if you're in hell, and you're mad at someone, where do you tell them to go?

5. What year did Jesus think it was?

by slapping em around with your dick

Parent

makes sense. Thx AL1, u way bestest than hattivatti gay shaman

Parent

1. Cold blooded abstinence.

2. We don't, Americans and Islamists (among others) do in their twisted understanding of justice and the oh so un-Christian "an eye for an eye"

Parent

I'd rather slap em around with my dick but thx for the answer anyway.
u didn't answer #3 ;(
e: added a #4 and #5

Parent

3. You have succeeded. If you try to fail, you usually have valid reasons for it and ultimately end up being closer to your goal.

4. I don't buy into the Catholic principle of hell. But imagining that I'd do it would be something along the lines of "I hope you stay in hell"

Parent

i want the new FM

Me too.

Parent

think about all the good in your life - it's only temporary
think about all the positive sides in life - they never last forever

why is this???

cause they were slapped around by a dick

Parent

I suggest you drink to forget, always the simplest solution to drown your sorrow in it. All you can do is bury your dreams and choose mind refinery.

On a more serious note: People get accustomed to certain standards. Eat cake for two years straight and cake will taste boring. Good things happen to us everyday that we don't notice. Imagine calling your mother for the first time in two years (if you like your mother), imagine passing the door to your own house for the first time in two years. It's not that things get worse, it's just our perception of things. That is why I hold people that say they fall in love with their spouse each morning with highest regards. They have not lost track of what is good and don't take things for granted. They are the rich.

Parent

:-) You got it!

Parent

good stuff

Parent

dick dick dick dick dick

gaylord - are you addicted to dicks Al7 (^^)

Parent

i am addicted to one dick, my own

Parent

why

Parent

Dick.

What's the meaning of life?

too late man, too late.

Parent

Too late for?

Parent

Why am I so awesome.

Because your punctuation is perfect.

Parent

erm.. he asks a question but didn't use a question mark!

you = fail :(

Parent

That I made that highly ironic remark.

Parent

When is my death date

On lan.

Parent

which came first? the chicken , or the egg?

Egg. Dinosaurs bred in eggs before they evolved into chickens. This sentence sounds oddly Pokémon related.

Parent

Everyone knew egg came before chicken lulz

Parent

the game.

FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU

Parent

What am i gonna do when ill be grownup?

Try all you can to remain young at heart.

Parent

What about religions ? We want the truth Mr Shaman !

There is no god, my brother played a prank on you.

Parent

huum , what about UFO's ? and there is any extraterrestrial life ? :D What about jesus ? Mohammed ? :D

Parent

Extraterrestrial life yes, UFOs no. Humans are the most advanced of all species in the universe. Jesus and Mohammed existed, but as political figures and not in the religious way they are held now.

Parent

Jesus had extraordinary super powers ? Who wrote the Quran ? because on the Quran there is some things that no one could know at that time .. so if you say human wrote it , how could they know ? ( you'll fail now ) :D

Parent

No Jesus didn't and neither did Mohammed. I'm not quite familiar with what is in the Quran that we can prove for sure that they didn't know.

Parent

Then you don't know anything, NADA bibuy :d

Parent

I know enough to know that there is no need for a god anymore.

Parent

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